Finger Nails

Pistol Packing Pink Nail Polish

Today Kiarrah has been so well behaved. She is truly enjoying being home with me. To be honest with you too, I love it myself. We are becoming closer and have a better understanding of each other. I am not saying everyday is roses but it is so much better than it was. I am so Happy that I listened to God and to my heart and pulled her out of the school.
Today I decided I wanted to get my nails done. I needed a little pampering and thought she might enjoy it also. I had told her that if could behave I would get her nails painted also. She sat there like a little lady and picked out a pretty pink color after I told her I didn't think red was for little girls. They painted her nails and even put little flowers on them. They wouldn't even charge me because she was so cute. I will try and post a picture later. She was really cute afterwards and said that we can't tell Daddy LOL.

Heartfelt Poem

Someone recently posted this on a mommy list that I am on and it always touches me when I read it. I am not sure who the author is but it is so beautifully written. I hope it touches someone out there like it did me.

Before I Go To Sleep…
Mommy, don't you cry now and Daddy don't you weep.I want to whisper something before I go to sleep. I know that when I came here I looked perfect in every way. And you were so proud, Daddy; when you held me on that day. Mommy, when you kissed me and wrapped me up so tight, I knew that I belonged here and everything was right. But then there was concern about developmental delay, I saw your worried faces as you knelt by me to pray. Mommy, I always notice how you wipe away a tear, When you watch the other children as they run and laugh and cheer. I may not be able to tell you how much I love you so, Or even show you how I feel and what I really know. But when you hold me, Mommy, at night when all is still, I feel the love you have for me and I know that all is well. And Daddy, when you take me to the park to run and playI know that you still love me though the words I cannot say. I want to tell you something before I go to sleep. I may be sort of distant and you may not understand, I know that I am not that little child that you and Daddy planned. But I love you both so very much and I know you love me too, And if I could only speak my heart, you would feel my love for you. I know the future is unknown and you will always have to be, The ones who love and listen and take good care of me. I know that you are frightened and you shed so many tears, And if I could I'd wipe them dry and take away your fears. So Mommy, don't you cry now and Daddy please don't weep. I want to say…I love you both, before I go to sleep.

Author Unknown

Two Steps Closer

Finally we are seeing some movement in Kiarrahs adoption proceedings. It is about time. The papers are in the attorneys hands and we just had to look over the Adoption complaint before it is sent to the judge. Baby girl will have our last name by this summer at the latest. I am so happy. This has been such a long unnecessary journey. I am so sick of hearing that paperwork has been lost. It is always someone elses fault. I will be relieved to no longer have to deal with Childrens Services. Don't get me wrong, we have had some excellent workers but there have been more headaches then anything. The division needs such an overhaul and needs some trainings on how to respect foster families. It is too much a them against us mentality.

Flutterbies and Pattertillars

While laying down last night I felt the baby quite clearly. She felt like a little butterfly giving me kisses in my tummy with her wings. I had thought I felt it before but wasnt sure. It was the most amazing feeling. I really can't wait until she really starts moving around. Remind me I said that when I complain that she is kicking on my bladder or ribs LOL.